A Closer Look at the 'Staches

As you’ve probably noticed, the Monsters have grown their best and bushiest mustaches – taking part in the furry phenomenon known as “Movember,” in support of Men's Health Awareness Month.

Fans have had the chance to vote on their favorite ‘stache and donate to prostate cancer research in the process.  Check out how the mustaches are coming along, as we've posted updated player mugshots!  VIEW HERE

LakeErieMonsters.com caught up with a few of Cleveland’s hirsute hockey stars to discuss the finer points of facial hair …


Do you normally grow a beard and/or playoff beard?
Mike Carman: I kinda keep the beard regularly, but I keep it trimmed up. But I love when playoffs roll around and I don’t have to keep it trimmed up. It’s an excuse to get it a little bushy.

Zach Cohen: Yeah. My beard grows pretty fast so I can grow it pretty long in about a week-and-a-half. Usually, playoff beards are pretty long and get real itchy by the time it’s all said and done.

Brad Malone: Yeah, but because I’m just too lazy. I rock the neck-beard for 50 percent of the year. It just kinda grows that way, so I’m stuck with it.

Hugh Jessiman: Actually, I’ve done mustaches. That’s what I do. I’ve done it when I’ve needed to get out of a slump. I’ve done it all sorts of times during the year – be it, February or whenever. I kinda let my beard grow out and when I feel like shaving, I just do the mustache and I just end up keeping it for a while. I think it is a slump-buster ‘stache.

Does every man secretly WANT to grow a mustache?
Carman: Does everyone? Guys that can, usually do. Not everyone can – you’d be surprised, even at this level.

Cohen: I mean, when you’re out socially, (a mustache) can be looked at kinda creepy, like the guy sitting in the corner staring at people.

Malone: I think it’s a pride thing. I think the bigger and thicker the mustache, the more of a man you are. I think it’s something everyone strives for, but all of us aren’t that lucky.

Who has the best mustache on the team? Who’s got the worst?
Cohen: Carman has an impressive handlebar mustache. He was growing his beard before so he had kind of a head start. The worst one? I probably gotta say it’s Chouinard or Olver. They really can’t grow anything right now. It’s not their fault. They’re trying hard.

Malone: I don’t know if I can pick one guy – it’d probably be between Carman and Jessiman. They’re the top two. I’m not gonna say anyone has the worst because it could be me.

Jessiman: I’d have to say that THIS ginger ‘stache is pretty far up on the list. But I’d say Luke Walker is giving me a run for my money. I’d say the worst ‘stache has to be Joey Hishon. We keep him pretty low-key because it’s pretty greasy. He’s a rookie. He’s got a rookie ‘stache.

Any chance you’ll be keeping the mustache past Movember?
Carman: We’ll see. But I think enough is enough. I’ve had enough of having the hair hanging over into my mouth.

Cohen: Probably. I might as well. My dad wore it for about 40 years. He shaved it a few years ago, so this one is in memory of his.

Jessiman: I thought about it, for sure. It depends on the growth, the length, the bushiness and the outward movement of it. And obviously, it depends on how we do with the ‘stache on as a team. We have several games to make it work and hopefully we’ll get on a good roll and I’ll be able to keep it.

Fans, don't forget, you can support your favorite player in their Movember efforts! Click here to donate to your fave 'stache and help us raise money for prostate cancer research!


'Stache Matchup
Mike
Carman
Zach Cohen
Brad Malone
Hugh Jessiman
Saddam Hussein
or
Burt Reynolds
Burt Reynolds. You can’t even ask that question.
Burt Reynolds.
Burt Reynolds.
Burt Reynolds, for sure.
Joseph Stalin
or
Hulk Hogan
Hulk Hogan. You gotta stay American.
Hulkamania!
Hulk Hogan.
I’ll go with Hulk Hogan.
Magnum P.I.
or
Ron Jeremy
Ron Jeremy, for sure.
Ron Jeremy – he’s got he curly hair to go with it.
Ron Jeremy – 100 percent.
Ron Jeremy. He’s unbelievable. He’s definitely got ‘stache swagger.
Ned Flanders
or
the Village People
Village People
Ned Flanders
Ned Flanders
Ned Flanders
Cheech
or
Coach Mike Ditka
Cheech and Chong, gotta go with a classic.
Mike Ditka – hometown Bears, gotta go with Coach Ditka.
I’ll go with Ditka on that one.
That’s a tough one. I’d go Mike Ditka. He’s kept it for a long time. There’s a lot of history behind that ‘stache.

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